Favorite Conversations from 2015

Kade on P90X: "This workout makes me want to go to Chick-fil-A."

Me: "Wanna clean some bathrooms with me?!?"
Kade: "Sure!"

On a short trip to the grocery store, Austin and Brandon saw three people they recognized from their new school. "This is freaky!" Austin said. "All of the sudden we know people!"

"No offense, Mom, but you look different now than when you were going to CrossFit. No offense!!!" -Austin, age 10

"Mom, you need to get me those winter headphones." (earmuffs) -Kade, age 4

"And please bless that Lars won't cry." -Family prayer. Every time. No matter who's praying.

Brock: "How long have you been doing that P90X thing?"
Me: "Two weeks."
Brock: "You've lost a lot of weight!"

"Mom, when you're an old lady and don't have any kids, you should be a cafeteria worker." -Austin, age 10

"I'm not just thinking about myself, I'm thinking about you thinking about me."
-Brock, age 12

"Kade, my feet are cold. Will you go get some socks out of my room and put them on my feet for me?" -Mom

Eden, while looking into her bowl of Cheerios: "Mom, I'm going to tell you your future: You are going to have six kids at once and three of them are going to be mutants!"

I'm sitting at the dinner table, slice of pizza halfway to my mouth, when Brock blurts out, "Hey Mom, can I have that since I'm a growing boy and you're on a diet?!?"

Eden: "Something smells weird."
Brandon: "It smells like air conditioner and protein bars."
Eden: "I think it smells like rotten pickles."
Austin: "To me, it smells like a fancy restaurant with rotten sea food."

"Brandon! There's a really cute baby in here! We must protect him from the coming orcs! Eden! Take your post!" -Austin, age 11

At Krispy Kreme: "I like watching the donuts get glazed. It's like watching the Roman soldiers get their armor." -Austin, age 11

Me: (exasperated, exhausted and a little bit whiny) "I need to workout, but I just don't feel like it!"
Eden: "You don't have to workout every day."
Me: "I haven't worked out in two weeks."
Eden: "Oh. Well I know! How about if I tell you the days that I have P.E. at school. That's when I workout. Then you can workout on those days too so we'll both be working out. Then maybe it will become a habit for you."

Me: "It's better to go unprepared than to not go at all."
Brock: "Well if I wasn't prepared to be a surgeon, should I still go as a surgeon?"

I took Lars and Kade with me on a field trip to tour the middle school with the twins' fifth-grade class. As we parked in the parking lot and were getting ready to go in, I quickly checked to see if Kade's face was clean. He asked, "Do you have to be clean to go to Middle School?"

Me: "How was school today?"
Austin: "A girl got mad at me because she thought I flicked a booger in her hair."
Me: "Why did she think you flicked a booger in her hair?"
Austin: "Because she found a booger in her hair and I sit next to her so she thought I must have put it there."

Leaky roof at the gym. First time in ten months I've done double unders (jumping rope). I wasn't sure how it was going to go, but my ever-encouraging coach says to me, "Just stand right here, Bobbi. There's already a wet spot on the floor."

"Brock shares a room with Austin; Brandon shares a room with Kade; Mom shares a room with Lars; Dad and I are the only ones that get our own rooms." -Eden, age 7

"Wunsupan a time thar wer three litell pigs..." -Eden's story she wrote in 1st grade

Dropping off at school:
Me: "Eden, you forgot to brush your hair today."
Eden: "That's okay. It happened once before and everyone just thought that I had curled my hair that day."

Kade: "How many jelly beans can I have?"
Me: "How old are you?"
Kade: "Four."
Me: "Then you can have four jelly beans."
Kade: "And when I'm eighty eight I can have eighty eight jelly beans!"

I often let Kade sit on my lap and steer the car up the driveway to our house. Today, after crawling from the back seat onto my lap to steer the car, I gave Kade a tight squeeze around the back and said, "I love you, Kade." He answered, "I love you too, but it's really hard to drive like this."

I dropped my car off at Kwik Kar for an oil change and walked across the street to HyVee to get a key copied while I waited. (Realized when I got to HyVee that the key I needed copied was on the key ring with my car back at Kwik Kar.) Carrying Lars in his car seat, I complained to Kade, "My arm is about to fall off because this car seat is so heavy!"
Kade replied, "Remember, Mom. Heavy things make you stronger!"

"No, Brock. You can't put Nutella on your celery." -Mom

Zoe: "What's your favorite color?"

Delilah: "Bobbi!"

Justin: "Where's Mom?"

Austin: "She's downstairs playing with Legos."

Brock: (shocked) "Really?!?"

Austin: "Yeah. But she's not very good at it."

Giving Kade his first "back to school" haircut:

Kade: "Mom, can I please have a Mohawk? I REALLY want a Mohawk!

Me: I'm not sure I want you to go to your first day of kindergarten with a Mohawk.

Kade: "Why not???"

Me: "Because your teacher might get the wrong idea and think you're a trouble maker."

Kade: "Wait. People with Mohawks are trouble makers?"

We compromised with a faux-hawk. He loves it.

"New rule! If you argue with your sibling, you have to eat one of their boogers." -Mom